[alberg30] Warning: No ALberg or sailing data contained. But refitting the boat reminded me of a hole in the water, and then this story.....

[dai at pdq.net]

From: "dai at pdq.net" <dai at pdq.net>

Gentlemen;

Here is a nominee for the next Darwin awards which was forwarded to me by a
friend. Thought you might all get a kick out of this... maybe we ought to 
nominate this pair as co-presidents to replace The Little King.

My subtitle for this is one of the two following:

1. If you think a sail boat is a hole in the water...read this

or

2. IDIOT TAGS: The reason legal officials use the terminology (oh!
for those uninformed, such a tag is a law enforcement Derogatory 
term....the bodies, of the two sportsmen, had they met a fate worse, 
would have been sent to the coroner who would say to his buddy: 
Pete: These two guys are legal suicides. Put the idiot tags on the 
toe and let the autopsy go. No sign of cerebral development in 
4 generations..."


Dai

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<   DUCK HUNTING WITH DYNAMITE

> >      True Story from Michigan, USA
> >
> >      Guy buys a brand new Jeep Grand Cherokee for $40,000+,
> >      and has $600.00+in monthly payments. He's pretty proud
> >      of this rig, and gets a hold of his friend to do some
> >      male bonding with the new ride.
> >
> >      They go duck hunting and of course all the lakes are
> >      frozen. These two brainiacs go to the lake with their
> >      guns, the dog, the beer and, of course, the new vehicle.
> >      They drive out onto the ice. Now, they want to make
> >      some kind of a natural landing area to attract ducks -
> >      something the decoys will float on.
> >
> >      Remember, it's all ice, and in order to make a hole
> >      large enough to interest a flock of ducks and a hole
> >      big enough to entice ducks to land, they needed to
> >      use a little more than an ice hole drill.....Soooo,
> >      out of the back of the brand-new Jeep Grand Cherokee
> >      comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40-second fuse!
> >
> >      Now, to their credit, these two rocket scientists DID
> >      take into consideration that if they placed the stick
> >      of dynamite on the ice at a location far from where
> >      they (and the new Grand Cherokee) would be waiting and
> >      ran back quickly, they would risk slipping on the ice
> >      as they ran from the imminent explosion and could
> >      possibly go up in smoke with the resulting blast.
> >      After a little deliberation, they come up with lighting
> >      and THROWING the dynamite, which is what they end up
> >      doing.
> >
> >      Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned
> >      the vehicle, the beer, the guns AND THE DOG????? Yes,
> >      the dog. The driver's pet Black Lab (used for
> >      retrieving - especially things thrown by the owner).
> >      You guessed it, the dog takes off at a high rate of
> >      doggy speed on the ice, reaching the stick of dynamite
> >      with the burning 40-second fuse about the time it
> >      hits the ice - all to the woe of the two idiots who
> >      are now yelling, stomping, waving arms and wondering
> >      what the heck to do now.....
> >
> >      The dog is happy and now heads back toward the
> >      "hunters" with the stick of dynamite. I think we all
> >      can picture the ever-increasing concern on the part
> >      of the brain trust, as the loyal Labrador retriever
> >      approaches. The Bozos now are REALLY waving their
> >      arms - yelling even louder and generally feeling
> >      kinda panicked.....
> >
> >      Finally, one of the guys decides to think - something
> >      that neither had done before this moment, grabs a
> >      shotgun and shoots the dog. This sounds better than it
> >      really is, because the shotgun was loaded with #8
> >      duckshot and hardly effective enough to stop a black
> >      Lab.
> >
> >      The dog DID stop for a moment, slightly confused, but
> >      then continued on. Another shot,and this time the dog -
> >      still standing, became REALLY confused & of course
> >      scared.
> >
> >      Thinking that these two Nobel Prize Winners have gone
> >      TOTALLY INSANE, the pooch takes off to find cover with
> >      a now extremely short fuse still burning on the stick
> >      of dynamite. The cover the dog finds? Underneath the
> >      brand-new Grand Cherokee worth 40-some thousand dollars
> >      and the $600.00+ monthly payment vehicle that is sitting
> >      nearby on the lake ice.
> >
> >      BOOM!!--Dog dies, vehicle sinks to bottom of lake, and
> >      these two "Co-Leaders of the Known Universe" are left
> >      standing there with this 'I can't EVEN believe this
> >      happened to me' look on their faces.
> >
> >      Later, the owner of the vehicle calls his insurance
> >      company and is promptly informed that sinking a vehicle
> >      in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT covered
> >      on his policy...He had yet to make his first car payment. >

Regards,
 
David Bell - dai at pdq.net

The young bloods of the South; sons of planters, lawyers about towns, 
good billiard players and sportsmen, men who never did any work    never will. War suits them.. They are splendid riders, first rate 
shots and utterly reckless. These men must all be killed or        employed by us before we can hope for peace.    General W. T. Sherman



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